Micro Memories

My last words to you...

Thu, 17 May 2012 13:22:30 -0400

I have been keeping all these feelings from you. I dont know why i cant tell them to you. I think i keep them to myself because im afraid to lose you. its not that im afraid to lose you really, but that ill be loosing someone ive become comfortable with. Ill be losing company. Ill be losing the affection i love and miss. but, if the affection is no longer there then im not losing anything at all. Ill be looking at this as time wasted. Its not that i wanted to hurt you by keeping you next me. I know that im being selfish when i say i want to be happy. Happy used to mean being wherever you are. Happiness meant that even when im not with you id be happy knowing that we are happy together. But im no longer happy anymore. I look at you and i dont see the love like i used to see before. I get irritated and annoyed at the site of you. I dont want to end that way. Which inthink that with all my past lovers i mistreated them so that they will let me go.

I dont know how to get through to you anymore. I dont know how to get you to understand me and how i feel. Why is it so hard for you to try to uderstand me.
All i do is think of “us” and “we”, but you always say “me” and “u”.

I think im scared because what if i let you go and i regret it? Id be pain to see you happy with someone else. How could you be so good to her and not to me?

But i shouldnt be that way. I want to let you go but i dont have the courage to do so because i still love you. I would still do anything to make you happy because i care about your happiness. Thats how i know how much i love you… I have become selfless…

But that has to change now. Youre young. What do you know about relationships? its all about give and take. youre not ready and im tired of waiting to be. Im tired of fantasizing the day that youll be ready and willing.

I have to go and will no longer wait for you. Enjoy your youth, we dont need drama. It should be fun, life. you sleep next to me not knowing that im typing what would be my last words to you.

I would like to stay friends. i dont want to lose you as a best friend. But i dont want the relationship. if that means that we cant be friends then it was a pleasure to have had you in my life for a while.

Youre amazing, caring, sweet, straightforward, a good man…

Goodbye my love,
I wish you happiness in all you do.

These would be my last words to you

My godson baby Jaden Lawrence

Tue, 15 May 2012 22:14:44 -0400

My godson baby Jaden Lawrence

My Boyfriend. His name is Miguel Alejandro Rodriguez. He’s...

Mon, 14 May 2012 15:46:00 -0400

My Boyfriend.

His name is Miguel Alejandro Rodriguez. He’s a tad bit younger than I and I don’t mind being called “Cradle-rocker”. I like being the older one. (laughs it off) I believe we started on a rough patch of horrible communication. I would always be moody and emotional because he didn’t meet my expectations or just didn’t do what I believed all boyfriends should know.

The boyfriend mannerism.

However, over the years, I have had other boyfriends and none compare to Miguel. Past lovers were … With Miguel, I choose to be an amazing girlfriend. I try to understand the way he is without pre-expectations. I appreciate looking at him for the way he is than to compare him with better lack of skills my exes have had. One characteristic doesn’t make him perfect , nor will one break the mold. He is strong and he is becoming my backbone in life.

His kisses are always sincere and I know he loves me very much.

ROBOTS OR DINOSAURS?

Mon, 14 May 2012 15:15:43 -0400

I like adventure. Survival of the fittest. If I could travel back in time and see dinosaurs, that would be a dream come true. Dinosaurs, may be dangerous, but they are beautiful and ominous creatures. Ptyerodactyls is what i wish i could see one day…

My mother. It was her day yesterday. We finished the Y-Me walk...

Mon, 14 May 2012 14:53:58 -0400

My mother. It was her day yesterday. We finished the Y-Me walk in support of breast cancer. My boyfriend and the rest of the family supported tita V at the walk. hopefully many more years to come.

Loving Always,
Lianne

Last year August, Jaren Cyril Beltran was born. Visiting him in...

Mon, 14 May 2012 12:19:00 -0400

Last year August, Jaren Cyril Beltran was born. Visiting him in the hospital a day after made me in awe. To see such a wonderful baby boy. His fingertips and toes so delicate and fragile. With him sleeping, I just couldn’t help but smile. I couldn’t wait until I could carry him. Photo, at Kat&Ron’s wedding, I just had to grab him. Dressed up slick and very cute. He’ll grow up one day very dapper.

Loving always,

Lianne